The twinkle of christmas lights thumbtacked into the faded peeling green paint of my room cast small pockets of splayed light onto the walls. The world outside my windows is dark, night has come at last. The spring evenings last longer now, but the weather is not much warmer. We started a fire tonight to take the chill out of the house. That’s how I know the warmth isn’t here to stay yet. That will come.
On the bed next to me my black lab snoozes, board that I spent much of my day preoccupied with anything but her. Not counting of course the game of tug a war, the continual Frisbee toss and fruitless demanding that she return it. The slight of hand bread snack from the counter and the special car trip to the post office. Those don’t count. At least she has found solace in the coziness of my quilt.
It’s quite peaceful, though I must admit I am more tired then I like. I have nearly been up for just thirteen hours and already my brain has decided its time to sleep myself. It’s only something I do to myself. I work hard long hours when I do, then become a hermit never changing from pajamas when I’m not. By the time I adjust to having time for writing and art, I take another job and the vicious cycle begins again. Somewhere there is a balance. People create when busy and tired.
I haven’t been entirely unproductive. I have written, addressed and sent of letters of fund raising for my upcoming mission trip to South Korea. That, I find takes a lot of patience and focus from me. Menial tasks such as folding not being the strongest of suits for me. My dog Luan was thrilled by that activity as it meant she could convince me to take Frisbee breaks. I also have a hard time asking people for things of any kind. I could never make a goods salesperson. As it is, I am doing things that are a challenge and that in its self is a good thing.
is this peace?